Thursday, June 5, 2014

"Have You No Shame???"

Recently, two different people quizzed/chided me about being public with my dating and sexual life. The spiel I gave them seems worth repeating here:

I aspire to an honorable life lived with minimal shame and secrecy (note that secrecy is not the same as privacy). I occasionally feel queasy about my choices, but I suspect that's habituated, reflexive self-judgement rather than genuine discomfort. When I take an objective view of my life, I'm proud of how I've structured it: proudly nonmonogamous, a proud single-mom-by-choice, and an overall happy person.

I date as I do because I believe monogamy is unnatural and unhealthy. I've chosen to out myself so I can [attempt to] role model ethical, imperfect and still successful nonmonogamy. My hope is that others -especially my daughter- will observe my happiness and consider opening their own relationships.


  1. That is the best response I have see. Ever. Hands down. And I can totally relate to every word of it.